i almost feel guilty

about being this happy.  i'm getting ready for a blurt, here...

a month ago (i think, lost track of time), i was the most miserable human being on the face of this earth.  i was terribly hurt over the end of a relationship that should have ended years ago, anyway.  but no...i had to hang on to it.  the funny thing is, i don't know why anymore...

he dumped me.  plain and simple, he dumped me, then acted like seven years meant nothing.

oh, the world was black and rain drizzled from every opening in the sky and it was a dark and dreary life and if you hear violins playing in the background, it's my special effects to enhance my weak visuals here. heheh.

but babies, i am living proof that God watches out for fools and little children.  no sooner than my dreams crashed did i notice other things coming into focus.  old friends started showing up out of the blue.  newer friends...well.  i just feel so blessed.

i know our happiness is not determined by other people, but they certainly do brighten up the day, don't they?  life is great :-)

Meanwhile, up on GH&I

I work as a medical record assistant/secretary/handmaid on GH&I,  cell blocks in a medium custody prison facility.  I've been there since January 04; some days I want to go over fence, and other days, it's the most interesting job I have ever had.  There's never a dull moment.  Ever.

My favorite co-worker is Dr. H, the institution's mental health department head.  We hit it off when we first met - I believe it was that sparkle in his eyes that belies his bland expression and calm demeanor.  His sense of humor is pure dust, it's so dry. Ah, would that he could be my boss...life would be Magnificent.

My boss, on the other hand, hated my guts for the first year I was there.  I swear that to you on a stack of bibles because I saw it in her eyes, and especially heard it in her voice.  She doesn't hide much.  She went out for surgery last december, and when she came back in february, I started putting in job applications for other positions.  Walmart would have been  ideal.  But something happened during her time off and when she came back...she SMILED at me.  I danged near fainted.  She has been smiling since.  It's a frightening relief.

My janitor's name is Ervin.  He's a lifer - a little volatile, but very likeable if you know how to talk to him.  He tells me every day, "Ms. B, your office floor is gonna shine like glass when I get through with it.  This is the best office on this floor, and it's gonna look the part, just you wait and see, and Ms. B, I think them officers have been taking chairs from your office because didn't you have a red one and now it's not here anymore?  Them officers ain't go no business bein that comfortable - I'm goin to the unit manager and they's gonna give you back your chairs or my name ain't Ervin."  But then, there was the day his parole was turned down and he passed me in the hall cussing up a blue streak, looked right through me, and for the first time, I was a bit afraid of Ervin.

I have decided to pick up where i left off on my old journal, and write my strange, wonderful days with all the strange, wonderful people I encounter. 

And no journal would be complete without an entry about Spike and Hey You.

I'm beginning to feel at home here.