In December, my son got married. I remember how I cried because he was leaving, how empty the house seemed, how I brought Georgie-bear from PetSmart because it needed some noise. And then Lacy, who spooks me when I,upon waking in the middle of the night, catch her in the eerie blue glow of the television antenna with her nose turned skyward, possibly worshiping some dark deity only she can see, and to which she sacrifices our sofas, came to feather the nest.
Life was pretty good, between sweeping up George's blonde hair and restuffing the sofas. The kids were happy and on their own. I became accustomed to doing pretty much what I wanted, which may or may not include watching TV all night from what's left of the sofa.
And then last Sunday, my son called his dad. "Come get me..." and because of circumstances that won't be mentioned here, his dad "went and got him."
The baby has spent three nights with us. And it's nice to have them here, but I wish - and am sure my son does, too - that it was not because a family might break up for good.
In Marc's recent journal entry, he wrote about the inner voice. I'm listening to mine...it says to say as little as possible, but make what you do say count. Like..Don't rush into anything. Take a little time to think about what you can both make better, what you can compromise on. I love you. To both of them.
Ah, all we can do is let them make their own decisions. But a little guidance never hurts, if it's presented in the right way, in a fair and neutral way. I hope.
5 comments:
It's hard, almost as bad as when they started walking and just watching them teeter totter made your heart race, wanted to grab them up and stop the fall. This is part of growing up, I do hope that the kids will patch up their differences. Sometimes it helps to try to remember the love that you have for the other person, like make a list of all the good and all the bad...the good should stand out. Good luck...Sandi
Yes it is hard. We moved my youngest daughter home so many times and then she would go back. Finally we had to use some tough love and tell her this is it. Stay here or there. She stayed for 17 years and finally they divorced and can be civil to each other now. It was a marriage that never should have been. Hope everything turns out for the best. Paula
So sorry to hear what's going on. I hope they will be able to work things out. They'll be in my thoughts and prayers.
Martha
I'm wishing the best for everyone involved. You have the right attitude I think, about saying little but making what you do say count. Like you say, they have to make the decisions, but a little good advice from mom or dad, given in the right way, may be desperately needed (and maybe even wanted).
Lori
Sorry to hear about that... I hope they remember what attracted them to each other in the first place. Usually, that means in those early days, they were more concerned about each other, and not themselves... hope and pray that it works out for the best... take care
Mik
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